Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Ike & Me 9/27/08

No real lesson here... just letting it out...
Life has been SO extremely hectic since just before IKE - as we made preparations at work, and then, of course, at home. I have worked every day since the storm & I'm absolutely spent. Yet, I can't sleep... so I write:
We evacuated when we saw the surge coming in early - since our area has had a history of flooding in the past. Wasn't really worried about our home so much, but didn't want to get stranded with no power or water - and no way to get out. Anyway - we evacuated to Eastland, TX - where my corporate office is. A colleague of mine was so generous in offering us his lake house on Lake Leon (about 100 miles west of Ft. Worth - toward Abilene)... so off we went, with Mom & Dad & Dogs in tow. (The kids were all strewn about - Bri went to the Valley near Mexico with friends, Lauren went with Simone to their Aunt Stella's to ride out the storm with her, Blake went on a golfing trip with his dad, and Taylor stayed with her mom and rode out the storm) ANYWAY, working for a disaster response company meant that I started working remotely even as the hurricane was roaring onto land - as we were first responders to UTMB in Galveston. We enjoyed our little hurrication, feeling just the outer bands of the storm as it made it's way north - none of the rain, amazing clouds and the occasional high gusts of wind made for a lovely day. We totally enjoyed the tranquility of the lake, but admittedly, it was difficult to relax as we wondered how our home faired, as well as the homes of our friends & loved ones.... thank goodness for Fox News that kept us up to date. We were able to text with those who stayed home and send them updates on what was going on - since they were obviously without power for the most part.
Anyway... we got home on the Monday, post-Ike, just 30 minutes after power had been restored on our street, so Thank God we were never without power - although we lost everything in our fridge/freezer... at least we didn't have to 'camp' in our own home like so many others did and are still doing all over town. We were blessed to find that we only suffered minor roof damage, lost our fence and our trees & flowers have lost all their glory. Not too bad, in the big picture.
As I mentioned, working for a disaster response company, meant working when others were not.... and through that I had a security pass to get into the devastated areas. Can I just say wow... wow.... WOW! And not in a good way. It is SO sobering to see that kind of destruction. The camera, and even video footage, just cannot capture what it feels like to see something like that! That everywhere your eye can see is destroyed on some level. To see boats on the freeway, piers on the road, dead seagulls, squirrels, cows... I think the most horrific thing I saw was a drowned dog who had been tied to a tree in his front yard - having never been given a chance to survive. Boy, was I mad! And the smell. Nothing can describe the smell down there. Nothing! And then as the days wear on, all the vegetation begins to die and turn to straw-like brown. Driving around on the deserted streets with not even a dog walking, power lines & debris in the road - sometimes having to drive on sidewalks to get through. It really is a humbling, sobering and surreal experience... and it starts to get to you.
I have spent the last 2 weeks going into the storm ravaged areas - obviously to see what kind of help we, as a company with relief/restoration resources, can offer.... but in that effort meeting people who have lost much, sometimes everything. Living in this area, there is almost nobody who went untouched by Ike. But it's really tough when you meet somebody who has lost almost everything. Nonetheless, the human spirit is amazing! I met Ted last Saturday. I went over to Baytown, and at the foot of the bridge is a little marina. You can see the boats as you cross, they are still mostly attached to the pier where they were docked. Except now the pier is about 50 yards inland, and the boats are crazy-piled up on the land. Ted lived on his boat, and has lost everything. Apparently nobody had yet been to the little forgotten marina to see about it... and Ted greeted me with a shotgun (I guess he didn't lose EVERYTHING). Nice. When I introduced myself, and told him what I was doing... and asked him if he needed something... this big, burly, unshaven man began to weep. He just wanted water and food. I had a half empty bottle of water in the car - which he was grateful for and I called the authorities to let them know he was there. I have since taken food, water & ice to Ted several times. I just had to. The nearest FEMA station is several miles away, and Ted doesn't have a car. He is now being paid by the city to be the security guard at the marina. This man who first greeted me with a shotgun, now greets me as a friend - with heartfelt handshake and a smile.
I met Betty on the courthouse steps in Chambers County. Her home is a pile of rubble. Literally. She lost her dog to the storm. She was volunteering and giving direction to those needing assistance, and to workers/contractors like myself. When I commended her for volunteering when she, herself, had lost so much - she replied, 'I'm a Republican. Country first!" Wow.
There are so many stories everywhere - on the news, on the radio, and just in random conversations - of people helping people, of long time neighbors getting to know each other for the first time, of kids playing outside like in the 'old days' instead of watching tv & playing video games, families playing games with each other & actually talking, stories of what it was like during the storm, of loss, of tragedy, of miracles.
The first week was so weird. Grocery stores only letting 4-5 patrons in at a time, only to find there was no produce, no meat, no dairy - and virtually empty shelves. Long lines at the few gas stations that actually had gas. The endless lines at the Home Depot - with the employees asking you (in the line outside to get in - as they also let only a few in at a time) what you're there to buy - just to let you know they're out of it. The crazy random grids of no power - even as far away as Huntsville (which, by the way, is about 2 hours North of Galveston for those of you not familiar). Stores not open. No fast food. Curfews. And a strange darkness at night, with the hum of generators. To me, it was reminiscent of what you see in movies. Just weird.... and a bit creepy.
Week 2 brought back some sense of normality to the less impacted parts of our city (meaning the whole Metropolitan area of Houston/Galveston) as power was being restored. At work, you can't even imagine the level of nuts we're experiencing. I've been pretty impressed with my company - as this is my first time to be a part of a response effort of this magnitude (it is the 2nd largest response for my company - 2nd only to Katrina). We have mobilized about 150 (maybe more - not even sure at this point) personnel to respond - as well as equipment - and many of them are sleeping in cots in our shop and training areas, because there are no vacancies in hotels. Our office of about 6-10 people on a normal basis, is now filled with what seems like 50 people crawling all over each other, with nerves exposed. The frustration level at the amount of work, the hours required, and the fact that so many of our people have their own damage at home to deal with is starting to get to us all.
This week, my daughter, Bri came to work there, too.... I'm pretty proud of how she has stepped in and been a big help. She is, believe it or not, cleaning up after all those men who are bunking at our shop - making their beds, cleaning up after their breakfast, the bathrooms, the garbage, etc.... and then helping out with all the paperwork in the office. Like I said - she's doing a great job, and momma's proud. :) AND she loves it! Just ask her! Since her Coast Guard plans have been delayed until January - it was killing her to not be a part of all they are doing in search & rescue/law enforcement, etc.... so this little job made her feel like she's contributing in a way.
This past week also brought my friend Jenn, and her 2 girls (Jordan & Aryn), along with their dog, Gus to our home. Their family was still without power, so while her husband and son stayed home to deal with the damaged trees and such, they stayed with us. It was so wonderful having her & catching up on girl talk, loving on her baby (whom I had never met) and playing dress up with Jordan. Not to mention the fact that she cooked dinner every night!! I was selfishly unhappy when power was finally restored for them on Thursday. :)
So today marks 2 weeks since the hurricane hit. It feels like a month, at least. I'm exhausted, but I have so much on my mind.... from just the burden of all that's going on around here... I have long loved Galveston Island... it's beaches brought solace many times during some very dark days in my life. It's not the prettiest beach in the world - not by a long shot - yet I love the island! It hurts to see her broken. My heart breaks for the people there and all over who have lost so much. Yes, for the most part it's just stuff... but it was THEIR stuff. And our stuff... all of us who live here. The loss of landmarks such as Brennan's and the legendary Balinese Room, Crystal Beach... For those who haven't gone down to the hardest hit areas... I encourage you to do so as it becomes safer. If for no other reason than to count your blessings. It's an awesome and humbling experience to see the effects of the forces nature at their most fearsome.
Back to the exhausted part - I'm not sure why I can't sleep... it's all going around in my head... from the hurricane stuff, to the economic crisis, to the Presidential debates that I only caught part of, to the fact that I still haven't watched the season premiere of Grey's Anatomy (lovin' my DVR), to the yardwork we need to do, to the fact that we're hosting a little get-together at our house this evening... and my house looks like a HURRICANE HIT IT. :( I've been needing to journal about these events - it's how I sort through things... so now that all that has been said.... I guess I'll get to work on the last thing on that list!
I am tired.... but I am blessed!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Life Lessons - Take Him at His Word

I woke up very early this morning with the sweetest memory on my mind… actually, let me rephrase that because I just made it sound like it was a fleeting thought that just passed through. No, this particular memory was one that I treasure, but not one that I think about often. But this morning was different. You know those weird twilight moments, when you’re halfway between being awake and asleep? And you dream weird things? And you wake up and you can’t get it out of your mind?? This was like that, but more substantial. It was burning…churning in my heart.

Let me back up a few years and share the memory…

One day, when my now 14-year old son, Blake, was about 4 years old, I found him sobbing in his room. So much so that I could not understand a word he said, and neither could I console him. I rubbed his little back and held him while he cried. After a few minutes of this, he managed to choke out these words: “Mommy, I think I just shortened my days!!!” and then he went back to sobbing. Having no clue what he was talking about, I wasn’t sure what to say. But then he confessed something to me – honestly, I can’t even remember what it was, but he said “I disobeyed you!” You see, I had always tried to infuse my children with the Word of God, and one of the scriptures I had taught them was “Honor your father and mother so that your days might be long.” Blake, having taken God at His word, was sobbing because he was afraid that he was going to die much sooner than he would have had chosen to obey me instead.

I still chuckle just a little bit when I think about it, and it warms my heart… but this morning, God was using this memory to reveal a little bit of His heart to me.

I just recently read through the Old Testament, and in reading the accounts of the early days of the ‘children of Israel’, one sees God’s people constantly striving for the ‘Promised Land’ of their lives. Always striving, and not reaching that ‘Promised Land’… that place of fulfillment, of promise, of completion. It seemed that every single account of the ‘forefathers’ reveals this one common thread – one we can all relate to - Man’s Failure and God’s Mercy. However, in digging just a bit deeper, you see that in each instance God lays out a plan for them. He says repeatedly “If you will do this, I will then do that. If you walk this way, you will inherit the land. If you don’t do these things, you will have such and such…” and on and on it goes.

The point is this. The children of Israel didn’t have to suffer and struggle. Had they just taken God at His Word, followed the plan He laid out before them they would have reached their goals so much more easily and quickly!

Oh, to be as a child, to have the faith of a child… and to literally take God at His Word!!

Imagine if we didn’t keep getting in God’s way!? What do you think our lives would be like?? If we REALLY believed the judgments, the mercies, and the promises of God?? If we read “obey these commandments” and lived it? If we read “Love your enemies” and we actually did it? If we read “you are a new creation” and stopped feeling condemned. If we read “God has given you a spirit of power, and love and a sound mind” and we were no longer afraid? If we read “Bring your tithe, and prove Me” and we never had to worry about paying the bills? If we read “No weapon formed against you will prosper” and we faced our battles? If we read “by His stripes you are healed” and believed it?

God HAS laid a plan before us. We, through our own choices, disobedience, and apathy get in God’s way. We interrupt His plan for our lives, and choose, through our own actions, the harder way… the steeper path. Oh yes, this path may quite possibly lead to the same destination… But what if we actually took God at His Word and did it His way instead of our own?

Imagine that life.

Just imagine it.

10/05/06



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Life Lessons - Just Like a Pill

There are these two little pills that I take every day… at least that’s what I’m ‘supposed’ to do. And most of the time I do… and I feel great. So great, in fact, that I forget that’s why I’m feeling good. Does that make sense?

What I’m trying to say is that these two little pills make me feel normal and healthy. They replace hormones that my body no longer has the ability to make on its own. It’s no big deal… I pop my little blue & green pills, and go on my merry way… until one morning I’m rushing out the door, and I put it off; thinking to myself that I feel good and healthy… and it can wait, I’ll be fine! Same thing the next morning, and the one after that... until several days later, my skin is dry, my hair is falling out, I have trouble remembering things, I’m emotional and I don’t have the energy to even pay attention… in other words, I’m crashing! And then it dawns on me – or my husband says these five little words: “Did you take your pills?”

It’s at that moment that I realize what I’ve done. I have brought this on myself. I have the antidote. But more importantly I have the means of preventing this… and I forget; or I put it off until a more convenient time… forgetting that the reason I feel healthy and fine is BECAUSE I have been taking the medicine faithfully, and the medicine is working with my body to maintain. And now… I have robbed my body of the assistance it needs and it now has to do more than maintain… it has to overcome!

Last night was one of those moments… and I’m embarrassed to say that it happens way more often than it should, and I always feel stupid and angry at myself… in addition to feeling SICK! So this morning, I started back on the medicine after numerous days without it. There’s an almost-immediate difference, but it will take a few days to feel ‘normal’ again.

Foolish, eh? Yes!

And yet this morning, God used this as a life lesson for me….

You see, these pills are just like my prayer life! When I am taking something before the Lord every day, requesting His assistance, or intervention in a particular situation... or for that matter, when I take the time to have a daily, personal relationship with Him in all things… life seems to go more smoothly… Even in the ‘crisis’ times, it feels like things are in control because I’m letting God handle it. And life goes along… feeling normal, and healthy and fine….and I forget to pray… or I put it off until a more convenient time. Same thing the next day… and the one after that – thinking to myself that my kids are doing great, my job is successful, my marriage is fantastic, my health is thriving, LIFE IS GOOD… and I put it off… until one day, something crashes… and I realize… that I’ve forgotten my pills! I have robbed myself of the assistance I need to get through life. I can’t do it alone. I have forgotten that it’s BECAUSE of that daily pill – a personal, daily relationship with Him - that my life has been healthy, and normal, and good… And now I have to do more than maintain… I have to overcome!

Thank God that one dose makes an immediate difference… for me… and for all of us…

Did you take your pills today?

Seek, inquire of and for the Lord, and crave Him and His strength (His might and inflexibility to temptation); seek and require His face and His presence [continually] evermore. ~Psalm 105:4 (Amplified Bible)



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Life Lessons - Where Do You Run?

I had a “situation” I was facing last week… you’ve been there and you know the type: a ‘situation’ that had the potential for a crisis-level outcome… a crisis that could turn my world upside down… and I was afraid. Really afraid.

I had trouble sleeping for days. I talked to my husband, but I was ashamed to admit how afraid I truly was. I called my mother and a friend and talked to them. I reasoned it out as I played out all the possible scenarios in my head. I had faith that God could ‘fix’ this thing…. But why was I so scared? I had prayed…. A LOT… and still the fear of the possible ‘outcome’ almost paralyzed me if I allowed myself to think about it too much… and then I remembered something my daughter taught me many years ago…

Brianne and I had just rounded the corner onto our street when I noticed that the garage door was open; and as I pulled into the driveway I saw that the door leading into the house was wide open, as well! Fearing that someone might be in there, I backed out of the driveway just a bit… but I didn’t want to scare my daughter so I said nothing. I knew that her father was just a few minutes behind, so I decided to just pull into the street and wait for him. (This was before the cell phone era)

Being pretty perceptive, my 5-year-old child had quickly assessed the situation and immediately began reciting “God has not given me a spirit of fear; but He has given unto us a spirit of power and love and a sound mind!” (2 Timothy 1:7) As she continued to repeat these words -The Word- I began to weep. You see… I had been a Christian for many years and yet when faced with fear… with a ‘situation’, I ran to ‘man’ to solve my problem, to protect me… and my 5-year-old daughter had it right! She ran straight to the Lord and His Word. She never hesitated. She never even asked me what was wrong or what I was going to do about this… she immediately ran to God and applied the Word that she had in her heart... and she trusted Him to take care of our situation.

Everything was fine at the house, by the way… but the lesson was learned…or so I thought until last week…

Years later… when facing a frightening situation… I still had the instinct to turn to man for the resolution…. thinking that if I reasoned it out or talked through it enough I would figure out some kind of viable solution for my problem. Sure, I had prayed… and I had faith that God could handle this… but what I lacked was the TRUST that He would handle it.

You see… we can have faith and ‘believe’ God can do something… but where the rubber meets the proverbial road is when we have to take the action of TRUSTING Him to do it. Trusting Him means we have to let go of the ‘situation’ altogether, and literally place it in His hands. A simple example is this: you can believe and have faith that a parachute can open, but when you actually jump from the airplane, you take that faith and put it into action… by trusting that it will open. You can train, you can know how to pull the string, you can even know when to pull the string… but once you jump from that plane, you let go of all control… and place all your faith and hope in that parachute by trusting that it will, indeed open when you need it to.

God, as is His way, did intervene and take care of my situation…but I could have saved myself a few sleepless nights had I just trusted Him to begin with. There’s a line to a song that comes to mind: “My God can never fail! He’s been proved time and again. Trust Him and see… He’s got ALL the power you NEED!”

What time I am afraid, I will have confidence in and put my trust and reliance in You. By [the help of] God I will praise His word; on God I lean, rely, and confidently put my trust; I will not fear. Psalm 56: 3&4 (AMP)
My trust and assured reliance and confident hope shall be fixed in Him. Hebrews 2:13 (AMP)

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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Life Lessons - Beware of Knock Offs

At the risk of sounding like the church lady, I did learn a life lesson this week.

Growing up in church and in Christian school... you learn to talk the talk. You learn all the spiritual lingo, and if you're not careful, you become a chameleon. You do what 'they' do. You go to church, you don't say ugly words, you gossip by way of 'prayer requests', and you learn that if you follow all gossip with "bless their hearts' it's okay to tear people apart... you take casseroles to the sick, and you sing in the choir.... and you blend. It was only through a series of unfortunate events in my life, that I began to realize that I didn't like who I saw when I looked in the mirror.... that I realized that I needed to get face to face, toe to toe, and nose to nose with God... I needed Him to prove who He was. As I began to seek him, I became aware of who God is... who He is to me, and who I am in and because of Him.... and that what I had lived in the past, was quite possibly... a knockoff.

Anyway, that being said.... here was my life lesson of the week:

I came home the other day to find a pile of garbage on the front porch awaiting 'transport' to the dumpster. My husband had been moving things from his storage facility to our home, and had disposed of some items that he deemed no longer useful… garbage.


Imagine my face when atop the boxes and plastic bags, thrown haphazardly, was a large travel bag with the unmistakable, enduring monogram trademark of Louis Vuitton!! Like a good wife…. I questioned his motives as soon as he walked through the door – sweetly, of course – but questioning nonetheless!! His oh-so-casual response was…. (Are you ready for this??)…. "It's old! It's like from the 70's." Let me interject here and say that I am not a pack-rat, and neither am I one of those people who are enamored with name brands and fancy things; however, I do recognize and appreciate the value of a such a classic, and the timelessness of the Louis Vuitton emblem.


So, as I rescued my treasure from the trash heap, I was so excited to see that, while it clearly had been around for many years, it was still flawless! And as I ran my hand across the leather, I realized there was a life lesson here. God was trying to tell me something….


I first thought exactly what you're probably thinking… things about 'one man's trash is another's treasure'… or that God can use anything or anyone, even if the world thinks it is nothing… and all those things are very simple, yet profound truths. However, I felt there was something more… something deeper. I played with the zipper, which worked perfectly, and looked inside. The lining was intact and perfect…. and as I ran my hand along the inside I found the tag. There it was. LOUIS VUITTON. The name. Just the name 'Louis Vuitton' speaks of history, of timelessness, of riches, of success, of quality. It's impressive. It's notable. In years past, one could easily identify the wealthy travelers by their luggage alone… and those traveling with a set of Louis Vuitton trunks were among the elite.


Louis Vuitton has been around since 1854, and the classic and easily identified "LV" insignia has been copied for years. Many cheap, obvious fakes are out there, and are easily spotted. But, some very well made look-alikes are manufactured and sold on the 'black' market to those who want to look like they have the real thing. These are much easier to come by, and much cheaper. They provide the look, but not the price. They mimic prestige, but bring shame if discovered for what they are - knockoffs.


There was the lesson.


As Christians, we carry with us the name, the signature, of Jesus Christ! That name is timeless - literally. It is alpha AND omega. It knows no beginning, nor no end… it brings all the authority and power of God himself. With it, we have access to all the Wealth in the Kingdom, the only enduring wealth that exists. With that name we have heritage, we have quality of life, we have success, we have healing, we have authority! His "luggage" is easily identified. It stands out; it's unmistakable. It's ELITE!!


There are many cheap imitations of the real thing. False religions are the obvious ones, and easily avoided. The dangerous ones are the ones that really look like the original at first glance. Good works, helping those less fortunate, demonstrative worship, church attendance, reading the Bible... all really good things… But unless you have the right "tag" on the inside… the one with the name "JESUS CHRIST"… unless He sits on the throne of your life…. You've just got a cheap imitation.


Beware of knockoffs. The real thing is WAY better!

10.03.06



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Life Lessons - Scars

  • 11.23.06

    It's Thanksgiving… and in recounting some of the things I'm thankful for this year, one of the 'biggies' amongst so many things I'm thankful for today is that God is restoring 'feeling' in my body. Let me back up and give some history… and it's a little gross and more info than I like to share... but hang in there...


    I was sick for many years…. well, most of my life, really... suffering from various disorders and diseases that, among other things, led to the loss of several organs and a total of 29 surgeries – 27 of which were abdominal. God has healed me repeatedly throughout my life and I stand today healthier than I have been in many, many years. But, recently I began praying and believing for restoration in my body… and am thankful to report that I am now only on 2 lifetime medications (down from 7) and I truly feel fabulous most of the time! But….obviously, the results and lasting effects of all these surgeries is scarring and scar tissue. Now notice that I named scarring and scar tissue separately, as I have suffered from both. Scar tissue is most commonly the internal scarring that occurs post-surgery; also known as 'adhesions'. For me, it grew in my abdomen as web-like glue… causing my insides to stick together, crimp and twist and cause such pain until I couldn't even walk uprightly and was almost crippled. Unfortunately, there is no man-made solution for this other than – you guessed it- more surgery to remove the scar tissue. I had this done twice and the surgeon removed 4 and 3 pounds of scar tissue, respectively, and I have not suffered from this again. Now, scarring is the result of any burn, injury, surgical incision, or trauma to the skin and God led me to some very good doctors who made sure my scars were as 'pretty' as they could be… however, what they could not control was the severed nerves which resulted in numbness and loss of sensitivity. There were some areas on my abdomen that I couldn't feel at all (i.e. I could literally stick a needle in some areas and not feel a thing – not that I did that very often, but admittedly I did try it once or twice just to 'see'). The worst of this was the constant feeling that it was itching, but I couldn't feel any relief from scratching. I know that's probably TMI (too much information) but think about how frustrating that must be! ANYWAY, in the past few months I have begun 'feeling' again… God is restoring the 'feeling' in my body….



    Now, back to where I was at the beginning here... in thanking Him for this restoration of feeling in my body… God began showing me something deeper…



    As I thought about all this, I realized that emotional scars are similar. A wound of any kind, whether caused by some incident out of our control, inflicted by someone else, or even as the result of something we did ourselves can cause severe damage and ultimately… scarring. We all suffer from the scars of life…the loss of a loved one, a failed marriage, broken relationships, hurtful words, betrayals, disappointments, trauma, cruelty, etc. The list could go on and on… and some of these 'wounds' come from our families, our employers, our closest friends, distant acquaintances, school mates, our church, or even ourselves and/or choices we make. Now, this is not revelation…. Duh! We all know this… and sadly, these things are just part of life. Here is the lesson God revealed to me:



    I got it mixed up. I did not delineate between the wounds and the scars. You see, the wounds come from an outside source, or because of bad choices we, ourselves, make (these are the self-inflicted wounds)…. But the SCARS are our part in it. We choose to let these wounds become a web of bitterness and unforgiveness. We let it grow until it cripples us, and the only solution is a surgical intervention from the 'Master Surgeon' to rid us of this pain. Again, this is not huge revelation, as there is much teaching on this type of thing. What the Lord was talking to me about today was the superficial scarring… the scars that look pretty good on the outside. There is evidence of the trauma, but they have been sewn up nicely and the scars are barely visible. However, they have caused numbness, a loss of feeling. You have become desensitized.



    Someone said something unkind, so it's okay if you gossip about them…. Someone passed you over for a promotion, so you chuckle if they lose their job… you didn't get the raise you wanted, so you quit trying so hard… the pastor didn't 'recognize what you did', so you quit volunteering at church… someone at church mistreated you, so you quit going… Someone hurt you, so they 'deserve what they get'… the loved one you prayed for died anyway, so you stop trusting… someone let you down, so you stop caring… you make one mistake, and you think you've messed up too bad, so you give up… God didn't answer your prayer the way you thought He should, so you become hardened…calloused… desensitized.



    You see…it starts out with a little bit of insensitivity, sometimes barely noticeable…but it will lead to crippling…and it happens while you're sleeping… because you've left the wound unattended.



    To diminish the effects of scarring (and this is squirly, but I'm a visual learner):


  • Apply the oil of God's Mercy directly and immediately to the wound.
  • Do not leave the wound unattended or uncovered, but cover in Forgiveness daily.
  • Wrap the wound in the bandage of God's Word.
  • Cleanse often. Wash in the blood of Jesus Christ.
  • Avoid exposure to gossip, as many wounds are contagious.
  • Do not remove the scab once the wound begins to heal, as this can lead to infection.

Remember, God does, indeed, use time to heal most wounds… but He has given us the ability and responsibility to control the scarring thereof ourselves.



I am thankful for the restoration of feeling in my body, but I'm exponentially more grateful that He has restored FEELING in my heart and in my soul. I had become desensitized; I allowed the hurts and disappointments I had encountered to harden me, and ultimately… I became desensitized to sin in my life…. But with God's love and mercy, and by taking the steps listed above…. I can say I'm thankful. I'm even thankful for the scars.... because they mean I've been in battle.... and I've won. What didn't kill me... truly has made me strong. And God has been faithful to keep me, and to restore the things that were stolen... and to take those things that were intended for evil.... and turn them around for my ultimate good.
I can truly say today and every day, I'm THANKFUL… for health, for love, for peace, for joy… for LIFE





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Connecting the Dots….


Connecting the Dots….


Dot to Dot… Moments in time…

Dot to Dot… Each moment mine.

Random points… scattered, askew

Various sizes… various hues…

Viewed collectively, they seem a mess

Viewed individually… direction-less.

But connect each one to the one that follows

A picture unfolds… at first glance, hollow.

Don't be discouraged, the dots make sense

When viewed connected, and in past-tense.

For each step you've taken, both right and wrong

Creates a picture… composes a song.

One that reveals the test of time,

A path, and a destiny, with rhythm and rhyme.

Every dot… every moment becomes who you are

The joys, the sorrows, the battles… the scars.



When your life just doesn't seem to make sense....

Correct… the mistakes.

Reflect… on the good things.

Reject… the guilt.

Affect… the future.

Expect… great things.

Select… the whole picture, and not just a part

Connect…all the dots of your life, of your heart…

Perfect… what you see... its not dots... its Art.


You place the dots.... God makes it art.
pH © 03/29/07


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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Life Lessons - The Speed of His Voice

We recently went to the Air Show to watch the U.S. Air Force "Thunderbirds" perform. They demonstrated the power and skill of our nation's military jets as they wowed the crowd with their show. As I stood on that hill, I was amazed by the precision of the flight formations of the aircraft as they flew overhead, seemingly just inches apart. The planes would separate, turn, and fly head-on toward each other at full speed, only to pull up at what seemed like the very last second to avoid collision! They flew upside down, they spiraled, they did mid-air cartwheels and they never missed a beat. I was awestruck and humbled by the fearlessness and expertise of each of the pilots.

The roar of the planes was such that we couldn't hear one another speak when they were just overhead… but, wait… they were NOT overhead! Indeed the airplanes were long gone by the time I heard their 'thunder'… and it occurred to me that God was using this display to reveal a bit of Himself to me...

Because God transcends time and space; when He speaks – by the time we 'hear' His voice - He has already been there, and it is already done. He does all things with precision and He never misses a beat… He is a skilled and masterful pilot...and when it appears that a collision is imminent… as long as He is the pilot - as long as we let him be… there is no need to fear. He dazzles with the splendor of a sunset, or the simplicity a kitten's purr… He speaks, and the winds obey. He speaks, and the birds hush their singing. He speaks and every knee bows. He speaks in thunder, in a raindrop, in a whisper, in a breath. He speaks to your need, to your hurt, to your hearts' cry, to your heart… He speaks, and it is already done.

Now, let me just learn to listen!


11.03.06


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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

New Beginnings...New Dreams... New Love

I once posted a blog that said "What a difference a year makes!".... what, indeed! This road called life has taken a few unforseen bends, with the mountains and valleys that we all must travel at various points in our journies.... I suppose it's truly a good thing that we know not what our futures hold.... it would take away all the surprises!!

But this path is bringing sunshine after rain... butterflies from caterpillars.... joy after mourning.... contentment, happiness, laughter and WOW!
To HH... on our Wedding Day...


New Beginnings… New Dreams… New Love


New Beginnings… I welcome you.
You are what tomorrows are made of.
You bring hope, and expectation… and life!
Just as the shaft breaks through the soil,
You are the budding promise of a garden in bloom.

I thank my God for second chances.

New Dreams… From the dust you arise,
leaving behind the ashes of yesterday.
Your inspiration bursts forth from the desires of my heart.
You follow me into the dawn of a new day…
Your fulfillment breeds more of the same.

The future has purpose because of you.

New Love… you have invaded every fiber of my being!
My joy erupts from deep within…
spilling out into my countenance.
You mock all attempts at maturity,
as I giggle like a girl with her first crush.
You mirror God's pursuit of man… of me…
You're a reflection of His longing for us.

I delight in the celebration of you!

Celebration… No better word to describe our wedding day!

The day I vow to share with, dream with, work with, pray with,
laugh with, cry with, curl up with, walk with, build with,
worship with, do chores with, have fun with, do all with…

My Love…
My Lover…
My Best Friend…
My Soul Mate…
My You…



PH Copyright 2006


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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Guilt... and travelling light.

Guilt. Why do we insist on carrying it around like a plethora of luggage filled with piles of clothes that we won't need or wear on this particular trip?

Let it go!! I'm talking to ME here. Let it go, for the love of everything!!!

Guilt. It's kinda self-absorbed, too... as if WE are in charge of everything... like if we had done 'whatever' correctly or enough of it... then we could have controlled the outcome. Pshh!

Guilt. It's such a powerful tool. It keeps us from enjoying today... and tomorrow.

Why are we carrying it around again??

:-} <<<<>

An excerpt from Traveling Light by Max Lucado:

I fell asleep in the Louvre.

The most famous museum in the world. The best-known building in Paris. Tourists are oohing and aahing, and that's me, nodding and snoring. Seated on a bench. Back to the wall. Chin to my chest. Conked out.

The crown jewels are down the hall. Rembrandt is on the wall. Van Gogh is one floor up. The Venus de Milo is one floor down. I should have been star struck and wide eyed.

Denalyn was. You'd have thought she was at Foley's Red Apple sale. If there was a tour, she took it. If there was a button to push, she pushed it. If there was a brochure to read, she read it. She didn't even want to stop to eat.

But me? I gave the Mona Lisa five minutes.

Shameful, I know.

But it wasn't my fault. I like seventeenth-century art as much as the next guy … well, maybe not that much. But at least I can usually stay awake.

But not that day. Why did I fall asleep at the Louvre?

Blame it on the bags, baby; blame it on the bags. I was worn out from lugging the family luggage. We checked more suitcases than the road show of the Phantom of the Opera.

I can't fault my wife and daughters. They learned it from me. Remember, I'm the one who travels prepared for an underwater wedding and a bowling tournament. It's bad enough for one person to travel like that, but five? It'll wear you out.

You think I'll ever learn to travel light?

I tell you what. Let's make a pact. I'll reduce the leather bags, and we'll both reduce the emotional ones. After all, it's one thing to sleep through the Louvre but quite another to sleep through life.

We can, you know. Do we not dwell in the gallery of our God? Isn't the sky his canvas and humanity his magnum opus? Are we not encircled by artistry? Sunsets burning. Waves billowing.

And isn't the soul his studio? The birthing of love, the bequeathing of grace. All around us miracles pop like fireflies—souls are touched, hearts are changed, and…

Yawn. We miss it. We sleep through it. We can't help it. It's hard work carrying yesterday's guilt around.

It's also enough to make you miss the magic of life.

Then let's get rid of the bags! Once and for all, let's give our luggage to him. Let's take him at his word! "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest" (Matt. 11:28 NLT).

My Child…..

This was written to my daughter during a time of struggling with poor decisions, trying to figure out who she is and what she wants to be.... teenagers... ugh!


My Child…..


Flesh of my flesh…. my blood… my twin…. my breath.

Reach for life…. And stop chasing death!!

Be beautiful. Be raw. Be strong. Be YOU!!!!!

My heart screams for you to just be YOU!!

OH GOD…. JUST BE YOU!!

I want to grab you and hold you and let you beat your fists until your anger is gone.

I want to protect you from yourself.


I want to hide you away from all who seek to devour you… the forces, and the so-called friends… the two sometimes seemingly united in their goal.

I want to hunt them down and destroy them!!

But I can't. I can't! I CAN'T!!!!

Only you can do this for you.

Only you can choose to be you…. Maybe this is what they mean when they say 'Go find yourself'…. Because my heart's cry is for you to find yourself! Soon.

I miss you, my baby… my child. I miss you!

I miss beautiful, strong, bold, sensational you!

I miss my friend. My comedian. My joy. My you.

Can you please go find you? Because this…. THIS is NOT you!


Stop chasing death. And weakness. And stupidity….

Those things come easily enough; you don't even have to try.

Stop taking the easy way; aren't you sick of all the people on that road?

Look at their eyes. Their eyes are cold. Yours used to be full of life, and mischief, and excitement.
Now they reflect all that you see.

You're just looking in the wrong places….. and you know it.
I KNOW you know it.

Your laughter is hollow.
Your mischief, deceit.
Your strength has become your weakness.
Your joy has been stolen.

Take it back. Take it BACK!! TAKE it all back!!!

Fight for you, baby… FIGHT FOR YOU!!! Be who you're meant to be. Be who you WANT to be!

"...the tension is here - between who you are and who you should be, between how it is and how it could be.... maybe redemption has stories to tell.... maybe forgiveness is right where you fell...


I dare you to move.... I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor... Like today never happened... today never happened before.... where can you run to escape from yourself.... where you gonna go? Salvation is here..." Switchfoot


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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Never Forget



Storms yield.
Cleansing rain.
Beauty revealed.
Serenity gained.


Still, small voice.
Power of three.
Giving me choice.
Speaking to me.


Senses awaken.
Feeling alive.
No longer shaken.
Starting to thrive.


Fear departs.
Curiosity wins.
Softened heart.
A chapter begins.


Blank pages.
Bright, colored pens.
Fresh vision.
A brand new lens.


Dreams return.
Ideas abound.
Giving back.
Fertile ground.


One source.
One alone.
Never forget.
The foot of the throne.



Copyright (c) 2005 PB



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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Glass House



Imagine a place so transparent; it cannot sustain a lie...
A glass house, of sorts; a healing place... where secrets go to die.

Honesty in its purest form... raw and fully exposed...
With nowhere to run and nowhere to hide the things that we wish to hide most.

Secrets... the word itself... eludes to such mystery...
Of skeletons in dark, dark closets and ill-fated history.

But secrets, I say, go deeper yet... to intangible things of our will...
Desires, and hurts, even character traits, and dreams we wish to fulfill.

The things that comprise who we really are often remain unknown...
In effort to present a perfect self, we continue to feel alone.

Vulnerability comes when we let them in...
revealing all secrets and exposing all sins.

Sharing our goals, our darkest pain,
our embarrassing moments, and every stain.

Daring to show them, taking the chance...
To laugh, to cry, to sing, to dance.

Only then will you find it, only then is it true;
A soul who knows all and loves through and through.

So, though it seems fragile in its translucency...
A glass house ultimately brings security.

When everything's out there, and all is revealed...
Only then will you find a love that is real.


Copyright (c) 2006 PB



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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Diary of a Divorce

This is an old one... it is taken from my journal entries during a one year period in my life surrounding the demise of my first marriage... Even though the contents is sad & dark...I post it in hopes that anyone going through the nightmare, the confusion & pain of a failing/failed marriage can draw strength and encouragement that God, through time, truly does heal, and that the darkness really does give way to dawn.... whether through restoration of the relationship, or as in my case... healing of the broken places in my heart after the divorce.
~Diary of a Divorce~

November 29th

Tears... I’m so finished with you.
The cleansing power of you is no longer appreciated.
Reckless rivers, storming through the memories of what used to be my life…
leaving a path of desolation.
Nobody respects you, they don’t even recognize your source.
Emptiness… you are my world.
I bathe in your darkness. I am comfortable here for you are what I know.
Futility… why do you remain so close?
Blow after blow you continue to stand.
How did you get so strong?
I fed you without even realizing it.
Time...Please be kind.
I am me no longer.


December 10th

Time…. They say you heal all wounds.
Do you?
I’m waiting.
Emptiness still abides… but has invited a friend…
Destruction.
Gone is the glory of the former days.
Gone are the dancers and the musicians.
Gone are the riches.
Ashes and dust abound.
A kingdom always falls from within.



December 27th

I don’t recognize him, though in my dreams I’ve loved him always.
How did I convince myself of love’s return?
They say love is blind… it must be so.
Blindly I loved.
Blindly I believed in love’s return.
Blindly I obeyed.
Submission…. You are so misunderstood.
The final petal has fallen…..He loves me not.
The realization brings clarity.



February 14th (Valentine’s Day)

Celebration of love?
Amusing.
It brings the laughter of the insane.
Behind the mighty wall, the rumblings can be heard by those who are listening.
Does anyone hear them but me?
Like a tired newscast late in the night, the warnings fall on sleeping ears.
Devastation lurks, its shadow drawing ever closer.
I can’t breathe.
I’m paralyzed.
Nevertheless, our masks are in place…
the plastic smiles and bright colors a mockery of the agony beneath.
What is it we’re celebrating, again?



March 30th

I stand at a fork in the road.
A move in either direction seems wrong.
Yet, I can’t retreat.
I am driven forward; compelled with the urgency to gain control.
Neither the memory of what once was, nor the dreams of what could have been comfort me.
I can’t change the circumstances, but they have certainly changed me.
I rage against the suffocation.
A choice must be made... and it is mine.
I go forward alone with the realization that I always have.
I write.
I cry.
I shout.
My words bounce back like a schoolyard ball after recess.
I am alone in a crowd.



April 23rd
I moved out today.

I have no words.



May 10th


Separated...

Your very name screams failure.

Your casualties are many;
your sorrows… deep caverns in my soul.
The ravages of war are as visible and devastating within,
as they are in the world I knew.
Sanctuary... he has never darkened your doorway.
Sleepless nights... I mock you now.
Like sunshine after rain, I am refreshed...
the simplicity of which is divine.
Laughter...you are a welcome reprieve;
returning like the prodigal son.
I greet you as a long, lost lover.
Courage...walk with me.
I am different.
I am changed.
I am alive.
I can do this.


November 28th

Closure...with the sound of the gavel you greet me, wrapping me in your embrace.
You bring the solace I have longed for.
Time... your promise of healing stands true.
Your hands have held me as a father holds his child in the night...
chasing away fears, both real and imagined.
Your very existence transforms.
Pain... you are a part of my soul.
I look into my children’s eyes and see your face, for you have violated their world.
As a rushing river alters the face of the earth, your surge has invaded every crevice of my being. Your power is diminished as the waters recede.
Experience...you have made me rich.
You are not in vain.
You fashion who I am.
Your gifts are abundant,
your memories both bitter and sweet.
What are your intentions?
I am frightened, yet exhilarated by the possibilities.
Joy...the laughter you evoke comes from deep within;
I thought you were lost forever.
In childlike play, you snuck up on me when I wasn't looking...
reminding me that God has a sense of humor.

Life... I once stood at a fork in the road, and pondered which path to take. Part of me will always wonder what was down the other road. History proves that every walk of life reveals sunshine and rain... simple forces of nature that have the capacity of catastrophic proportions, hidden behind the whisper of a breeze. The only thing certain is that on this path, as on all others, I can only take one step at a time... and the only thing that I can change is me.

Strange how the most simple is still the most profound.
Copyright (c) 2005 PB



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Life Lessons - Lessons from Life for Life by Patti Hamilton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.